Reconciliation… When I decided that I want to learn more about this process, I expected that after acquired knowledge I will be able to take a step forward in my society and that I will be able to contribute to a noticeable change. Unfortunately, the expected results were absent, but this cognition meant a lot to me personally, because I realized that we need much more to learn and to change ourselves.
In order to be able to contribute to the reconciliation as a higher purpose, you need to start with yourself. There is a dictum that says: If you want to change the world, start with yourself. Be the change you want to see in the world (Gandhi). My intention was not to become a megalomaniac, I wanted to change my nearest surrounding, bad habits and prejudices instilled. However, all my élan and enthusiasm quickly died down due to lack of substantial support of my surrounding for new „ideas“ which were promoted from my side. Disappointed, I became aware of the reality and that in what kind of environment I live. I decided to start a process of reconciliation in myself, between my expectations and desires on the one hand and the reality and the general condition in which we live, on the other.
Bad luck has befallen me, because of unfortunate events at a football’s game. First thoughts after these events were, who is guilty, whether Serbs and Albanians will ever reconcile? In the coming days I saw myself on the edge, accused by Albanians because I’m a Serb, seen through different eyes of the Serbs because I’m not accusing Albanians. Just in that time I had to promote reconciliation?! I just want to watch football, and only later I realized, that football, this game… it does not matter at all. We do have elementary problems, but we are not aware of them. Another dictum says: If you want to be respected by others, and you have to respect them.
Only after a certain time, I realized… I don’t know enough about reconciliation, I realized that this is a long term process that requires a lot of preliminary steps, actions, which we, unfortunately, skipped. I realized that people in my wider area, without determining on national, ethnic or any other basis, they need something much more important, more urgent and necessary than reconciliation. They need basic education, they need to become aware that they don’t live alone on an island, but they have to respect those next to them, because no matter how different we are, in one we are equal, all we are human beings. So I decided, even though I’m ambassador of reconciliation, first I have to promote the peace, respect of other people and their rights, and I am sure that this is more important and, unfortunately, more necessary.
Unaware of my internal change and thinking, I’m starting to point people around the unnecessary tensions, hidden hate speech and intolerance, pejorative statements, until one day I didn’t hear a comment about myself, a friend says that Tibetans pray to me to return the spirit of the Dalai Lama to Tibet because it left their spiritual leader and possessed my body. Creative? Maybe just in the wrong direction. I don’t give up, but I realize that I lack the institutional support. Then, nevertheless, I remember one other Gandhi’s dictum: „The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.“ I forgive, and move on, because I want to be a change, I want to see that someone else, because of my example, continues where I left off. I hear, now and then, from time to time, some positive feedback, people congratulate to me, and to me it seems that they do not know to what.
Respect others, don’t think bad, don’t harm anybody, seek peace in everyone and peace will find you. Don’t talk about reconciliation because they will think that you want to sell them a story from the West. Talk about human beings, about respect of rights, and reconciliation will come by itself. I believe that, ask yourself the same.
